Saturday, February 18, 2017

Maureen and the Donald

Anyone who has read some of these postings would remember that I sometimes seem to have a bone to pick with the NYT columnist Maureen Dowd. I do. She doesn't work very hard.

She files one column a week that she claims takes her 7 hours to put together. That's not a lot of work for what I'm suspecting is a full-time position with the paper that includes benefits. Consider the gang at the obits desk, Sam Roberts and William Grimes who might each have 4-5 bylined, lengthy obits a week on deceased people from incredibly varied walks of life. Sometimes multiple obits on the same day.

Then there's Margalit Fox and Robert McFadden, who are updating the "morgue" obits, or the ones that are getting pre-written as best as they can be for the sometime-soon expected departed. Their bylines appear more often than Ms. Dowd's column.

When Ms. Dowd first hit the Op-Ed pages in the mid 90s I loved her take on many things.  And obviously she came to the attention of others, because she won a Pulitzer for commentary.

While to me she could never replace Russell Baker who had retired, her 'Liberties' column was a good breeze through an open door. Now, she writes like a standup comedian dispensing snarky one liners, that can actually sometimes be worth reading. I'm not kidding. The one about Trump soon entering an office where the pictures on the wall aren't all of him is priceless. But there's no
essay-like continuity to the remarks before the next snark is dropped. Baker did create a ballet in a phone booth, as he once described his efforts.

Obviously, I'm holding her to a higher standard than she can achieve. Now that I am a home delivery print subscriber I get to read the paper online as well. I take this opportunity on Sunday's to read Ms. Dowd, if she's filed anything. She tends to disappear for weeks at a time.

And online delightfully offers you the opportunity to post some snarky comments of your own if you get there in time. Wait till Sunday morning and you get shut out, they are flooded with too many Dowd comments to review for content and possibly post.

Some of mine have gotten in there, for whatever it's worth. They generally congratulate Ms. Dowd on finally showing up with a good one, or once again calling one in from her cell phone while riding in an Uber car going somewhere. Shopping, or eating out, maybe. She has told us what she's eaten at a meal.

Ms. Dowd takes an obvious hard stand on The Donald, but then again, who at the Times doesn't? When President-elect Trump met with the mucky-mucks at the Times in their board room he made the offer for any of them to call him anytime--except Maureen, who he said is too hard on him. No problem with that. Hard can be deserved.

Ms. Dowd doesn't really like anyone. If she even likes herself, we don't really know. She might only like her wardrobe. I have no idea. Whoever is there gets shot at. No problem there. We all need targets, and I seem to have one too.

So consider last Sunday's one liners that I commented on before the space filled up. I'm not so full of myself to believe that a great number of people read anyone's comments, but they do act as a safety valve that keep you from punching a hard object, or worse, kicking the cat who insists it is time to eat--again. (No Cosmo, it is waaaaay too early.)

Maybe it was the word 'sex' that kept my column from appearing. Maybe it was my continued criticism of Ms. Dowd's work ethic, but my comment did not get published, even though they were still taking comments. It is possible that my comment was so far back in the line that by the time they did get to it, they were full up. You really just don't know. It's like taking the test for the show 'Jeopardy.' They don't tell you how you did. If the phone don't ring, you know it's them.

I always send my comments to my daughter just in case I don't make the cut, for whatever reason. My oldest daughter likes to read to read Maureen to see how hard she's been on The Beaver. I tell my friend what I wrote as well. He tells me, "you really don't like her, do you." I tell him I don't like that she gets away with so little effort.

Anyway, for anyone who cares about how I replied to last week's Dowd routine, I offer it as the following. You will of course need to read or reread her Sunday, February 12 column. Who knows what she'll come in with this week, if she's even working. The Donald's press conference might be turned into a new reality show of its own. Stay tuned.

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Brava Maureen! You turned in another good one, a week apart from your last one. That's almost like working. Although, picking on Trump is way too easy, but you do do a good job of it and point out the relevant uprising awareness amongst the population.

I'm glad the Times is doing well again financially. You're worth more than the $3.00 WSJ. And at $2.50, with rising online income, you might stay in print for the rest of my life, which at this point I've measured to be about 15-16 years from now. Way to go. I wouldn't want to go before 'All the News That's Fit to Print' were to disappear.

I do worry that Melania is in New York during the week. I think The Donald does need someone to grab on weekdays to soothe his rough edges. There's nothing like Tuesday morning sex with the likes of a super model to make even Sean Spicer appear to be well dressed.

Keep up the good work. With The Donald in office you'll never be without something nasty to say. 

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I guess I can be snarky too. However, my pay is way below Maureen's.

http://www.onofframp.blogspot.com

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