The First Most Photographed Woman with Clothes On

There was no official title back when I was growing up, and by most accounts, there is no official title now, but if I had to retroactively consider women in the news who might qualify I'd certainly have to hand it to Zsa Zsa Gabor, who at 99 has now just passed away.

The King of the Crypt obituaries, Robert McFadden, has once again gotten his byline associated with another nonagenarian, centenarian figure. Sadly, he has to relate that Zsa Zsa was seriously ailing in the later stages of her life, and even had a leg amputated above the knee. But I'm hoping that didn't change her accent, a delightful fluency of English with a medium-weight Hungarian accent that was perfect for making her able to get away with just about anything, including not really having any discernible talent, which of course has never held anyone back from notoriety. Just ask George Hamilton, or Kim Kardashian.

Unfortunately, the obit doesn't give any insight into how she became known as Zsa Zsa, when her birth name was Sari. There aren't many people whose first names start with the letter Z. ZaSu Pitts is one I can think of, and she goes way back, an American silent film actress who was born in 1894, who was still getting parts when TV rolled around, notably on the 'Gale Storm Show,' a childhood favorite of mine in the 50s.

Wikipedia explains that her name of ZaSu was a portmanteau of the father's sisters' names, Eliza and Susan. My guess is Zsa Zsa is a childhood nickname from an affectionate Hungarian expression.

The encounter with the Beverly Hills police officer that resulted in her arrest is given space in the obituary, as it should be. Zsa Zsa was accused of slapping the officer who pulled her over in her Rolls convertible, as well as being cited for driving with an open bottle of vodka in the car.

Zsa Zsa took the defense that it was open season on people driving Rolls Royces in Beverly Hills, but I always wondered what the "slap" really was. Was it a Zsa Zsa tap on the cheek as you might expect her to bestow on a feckless male who has made an unwanted flirtatious advance on her? (To Zsa Zsa, the cop had to be cute, right?) Or, was it a real movie slap where the head jerks back? No details emerge, other than she was sentenced to three days in jail. No mention if she actually had to serve three days in jail. Her dry cleaning bill for that stint alone would bankrupt most people.

The above photo that accompanies the obituary shows Zsa Zsa with her two sisters in 1955. She is seen wearing white gloves, something women of even modest social status of the time wore. It is unmistakable that Zsa Zsa has anticipated cell phones. Today, she'd have a divorce app.

She is seen giving what to me can only be described as the cell phone pantomime, using her thumb to hold down the middle and ring fingers, while freeing the index and pinkie to indicate the device. It is that, or she's looking for husband number three, or giving a so far cumulative total.

Considering her eight marriages, she was famous for saying a girl had to marry until she found love. That reminds me of the comedian Alan King's dictum on what would be necessary if you wanted to read a book on love and marriage: You need to buy two books.

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