The Crowded Race

Who would have thought the machinations for England to leave the European Union would produce another entrant in the contest for the 'World's Most Photographed Woman with Clothes On?' But it has. It is a home run derby.

Scotland's First Minister, Nicola Sturgeon has spoken up and said that if Britain is leaving the E.U., then Scotland wants a referendum on leaving the U.K. Oy vay! Is this the way the empire crumbles? Not with a bang, but a referendum?

Britain's Prime Minister Theresa May has now formally signed the exit plans for England to leave the E.U. She is seen above, looking entirely magisterial--under whose portrait I have no idea--signing the paperwork required for the divorce proceedings to begin. An exit by 2019 is expected.

Into this breach Scotland's First Minister Nicola Sturgeon has asked again for a referendum for Scotland to leave the U.K. This was proposed a few years ago, with the Scottish voters turning down the referendum to leave the Motherland.

Anyone who has followed New York City politics for any length of time will know that there were years that the borough of Staten Island said they'd like to succeed from the city. There were studies, but I don't think it ever reached the referendum stage to appear on the ballot. Whenever this would occur someone would point out that someone would have to reimburse the remaining part of the city for the land that they now wanted to be free and clear.

It was almost like Texas getting itself away from Mexico. But there, they went to war over it. Nowadays, it is attempted more diplomatically. But at what cost? No one has an answer.

In fact, until Jimmy Breslin recently passed away, I had forgotten that the mayoral ticket with Norman Mailer for mayor, and his for city council president, included a platform for New York City to become the 51st State. Their slogan was: "Vote the Rascals In." This was 1969, and Donald Trump was not yet an emerging force, so Trump Tower was never mentioned as a site for the capitol. (In fact, it had yet to be built.) Considering Mailer would have been mayor, then the Carnegie Deli might have been chosen.

Scotland is somewhat like Staten Island. It sits on top of England and is seldom thought of by Americans until it is time consider single malt or blended scotch as a beverage of choice, the answer  to, 'where is Sean Connery from?' or when they play the British Open. Then, because the origins of golf began in Scotland, do we get a glimpse of that craggy countryside.

It is not really expected that we'll see much more of Nicola Sturgeon in our papers. Theresa May has already given the expected answer "no" to a referendum request, telling Scotland to wait until Brexit is fully accomplished and the new trade life is understood better.

As we have portmanteau words that end in "gate,"  even 40 years after Watergate, the British seem to have adopted our approach to words and have added "it" to a variety of new words.

The Daily Mail, a British tabloid with the enviable readership  of 3.4 million, has published the above photo showing Theresa May and Nicola Sturgeon seated somewhere in Glasgow. Of course there is a bit of an uproar for objectifying the ladies by running a story that asks the question, who has the best legs? "Never mind Brexit, who won Legs-it" as their cover story on Tuesday.

There is even a third contestant in the photo, but she obviously is not an official entry in the legs beauty contest, probably because she doesn't hold an elected position in the U.K.

Over the years, I've heard all sorts of slang that is meant to apply to women's legs: gams, stems, pipes, and pins comes to mind. The New York Daily News in the 60s in its Sunday edition would run pictures of toothsome beauties seated on their luggage with their legs crossed, telling us that so-and-so was headed somewhere on their cruise. These were referred to as "cheesecake photos, since the exposed leg is thought to resemble the white of cheesecake.

As anyone who watches the cable news show HLN in the morning will tell you, there are segments where the three female broadcasters, host Robin Meade, business reporter Jennifer Westhoven and media reporter Melissa Knowles, will sit on a coach with their legs crossed. It is as predictable as rain. It is the cheesecake part of the show.

The Daily Mail is apparently like what our Daily News was, and like what our New York Post is now. Playful. The copy they are running with the photo gives a critique of the legs and the poses: what the body language is telling us.

Theresa May; "knees tightly together... opted for a studied pose that reminds us she is ever the vicar's daughter." (How Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher might have sat and reminded us she was the "grocer's daughter" is left to other overheated imaginations.)

Nicola Sturgeon: "undeniably more shapely shanks...more flirty, tantalizingly crossed, a direct attempt at seduction. Her stiletto is not quite dangling off her foot, but it could be."

The reporter is a woman, Sarah Vine, someone married to a British politician who helped lead the campaign to leave the E.U.

It is a wonder the paper doesn't self combust before it is delivered.

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