Penelope and Her Suitors

I've already written I enjoy reading book reviews.

But there can be the occasional review about the author of a book that is even more interesting. And I think I just read it.

Perhaps 25 years ago or so I remember at work there was a luncheon for a woman who was leaving. I didn't really know her, so it wasn't something I went to. You have to have worked in an office that long ago to remember that at these luncheons people ordered drinks. Made with alcohol. And sometimes the guest of honor might have more than one drink. I mean, what the hell, they were leaving, weren't they?

It must have been something like that, because when someone I know came back from the luncheon they somewhat announced that lunch with Kathy was like having lunch with a Catholic Joan Rivers. This fellow I know then went in his office, closed the door, and probably slept it off. It certainly sounded like Kathy was in the words of a Billy Joel song: "One hit honey, and sure did put on a show."

So when I finally caught up to Thursday's Times and the Joyce Wadler story on Giulia Melucci, author of "I Loved, I Lost, I Made Spaghetti" I could only think maybe I should have gotten to know Kathy better. Maybe at least become casual friends.

If Joyce's story on Giulia doesn't help sell a book then there is no hope for reading. Or cooking.

Giulia is described as restrained as Joan Rivers on crack, hilarious and good-looking. (There are pictures which prove this.) Giulia went to a Catholic girl's school in Brooklyn, is 42, not married, and by the sounds of things, has no trouble at least meeting men and seeing where it goes from there.

Joyce recounts the story of the Scottish writer that was in Giulia's life who at some juncture says he only wants to be friends. Ms. Melucci, perhaps because of attending school with other girls who she describes as Mafia daughters, makes the writer an offer that Joyce Wadler says even a recently deceased man couldn't refuse. Giulia asks her friendly writer, "If we're friends, why can't we have sex?"

This is going to be some book signing.

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