Renewal by Andersen

I need another house.

Not necessarily a vacation home, just another house that needs to have the windows replaced. How else can I take advantage of the affordability that will let me go without paying for 18 months? No money down: Zero, Zilch, Nada. 

I feel like I'm keeping people out of work since there are no windows in my home that need replacing. That's been done decades ago. I feel I'm keeping people out of work.

No design consultant to greet at the door. No expert measurer; no certified installers, no customer service team. I'm keeping a small platoon of people from invading my home. It's the advertising campaign that must have an end. But when?

An invitation size envelope lands in the mailbox Friday.  "Our neighbor at..." is the addressee. It's okay they don't know our name. It's better that way. Open the envelope and there is a card telling us about the offer that you'd have to be in a coma or in prison (maybe at the space station) not to have heard by now: 

"This month, take advantage of our special financing! No Money Down...No Payments... No Interest....with trailing smaller print: "if paid in full." Well yeah. No free lunch here.

Huge phone number, and of course a QR code to scan and schedule online. We all know how to do that, right? What the hell does QR stand for, anyway? Two years my friend and I were at a table in the Fourstardave Sports Bar at Saratoga Race Track and in the center were instructions to scan the QR code for the menu.

Not knowing at all how to do this, I had to ask the waitress to verbally give us the menu. It's not extensive, so this doesn't take long.

The following year we were at the same table and there was a print menu on the table and no QR code. Know your audience.

I have to say, I am a bit envious of anyone who might be needing and ordering new windows these days and having the choice to pick out window trim in a variety colors. Designer colors of course. Black does look nice. Up to know it was the Henry Ford marketing maxim: Any color you want, so long as it's white.

Who gets to stuff newspapers with Renewal by Anderson inserts? Is this a job I might get paid for in retirement? I'm sure the publishers are not spinning newspaper copies off the presses with these nuggets tucked inside the sections.

The back of the mailed invitation to redo my windows and take advantage of the special financing might give a clue as to when Renewal by Andersen might be disappearing, somewhat like Mikie Sherrill's ( I was a Navy pilot.) ads for running for governor in New Jersey this past November. There's an expiration date of  the renewal campaign: 3-31-2026, looking like it's handwritten by the person stuffing these inserts in envelopes to "Our Neighbor At..." Auto pen, definitely.

Will the campaign end and another one follow? Only time will tell.

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